Setting: Rick and I met for lunch after the interview, eating at Andreas pizza in the skyway – a fav eatery close by to where I worked at Wells Fargo during 2011/2012. We then got out of the skyway and walked outside for a bit, enjoying the fresh air – more so me, than Rick (not sure if he really likes fresh air or not – lol)
We then went to downtown B&N, and actually also went to downtown Target to get him some groceries (he lives in the downtown area). Whereupon, we said goodbye to each other (with us, to meet again on Sunday).
But, I’m writing this post for another reason.
Once I said goodbye to him, Rick went off in one direction, since he had parked his car in the ramp closest to Target, and I went off in the other direction, since my car was parked in the Thrivent ramp.
I was on the Nicolette mall, and there was this young guy, sitting on the intersection curb, all of late twenties, or early thirties, with a young child with him (4-5?). As I was walking up to his corner, he caught my eye and said something I didn’t catch, I mumbled “hello” as I passed him, and he started saying something about how nice the weather was today compared to a few days ago – I was walking my usual fast pace and was already behind him by the time I heard his comment. I didn’t say anything, because, 1., I was already several feet behind him, and 2., I’m not a chatterer.
I keep walking, and I’m probably a good twenty, thirty, forty feet (or, even farther), behind him now, and I stop.
I thought about how I snubbed him – not on purpose, but because I was wrapped up in my own thoughts, thinking about which street to take to get to the ramp, or thinking about the interview, or who knows what.
Here was a guy, either homeless, or down on his luck, or maybe, a scammer. Who knows which.
And, he took the time to greet me, and just wanted to talk about the weather with someone.
As mentioned in a post a couple of weeks ago, I don’t carry cash with me anymore, most days. Today, I had two $10 bills with me – just in case I needed them for parking, etc., even though I knew the ramp I was going to be parking in, only dealt with cards, and not cash.
I found myself turning around, and I walked back to him – of course, now, my introvertedness comes up full tilt, and all I can do, is hold out one of the ten’s, and say “I’m sorry”. Not entirely sure, if he understood what I was apologizing for (for my curtness, rather than for his situation), but I put a hand on his shoulder (he was sitting on the sidewalk curb), and squeezed.
Hopefully, he got more than the 10 bucks out of this interaction with a fellow human being – I know I should have squatted down, and perhaps gave him a few minutes of my time – I was in no rush, but, again, sometimes, my shyness overwhelms me in situations like this.
(Crap, I shoulda asked him if he wanted a hug – I can do hugs. Really well, I’m told.)
I don’t care if he was a scammer – I spoke to a few people about my last encounter with the woman in the parking lot a few weeks ago, and they thought I did the right thing – either helping someone truly in need, or showing a scammer, not all people are jerks, and that some of us can show compassion, even when being scammed.
I remember last summer, either the week before Elyse was in town, or the week after, when I was downtown on that street photography workshop, and I met a very young girl (teenage or early 20’s), and she told me she was homeless – and I didn’t know what to say, AND, I didn’t have any cash to give her. I remember how sad and bad I felt later on, at home, for not being able to help her, with $$ or even with words. (even now, as I’m writing this, it comes to me, that I could have asked if I could take her to the closest restaurant to pay for a meal, but at the time, those thoughts just don’t occur to me.)
So, I’m out another ten bucks, and yes, I’m out of work, and really can’t keep doing this (on a bi-weekly basis – lol), but, even if I did it every so often, it’s not that much – won’t even add up to a hundred or so bucks (if I encounter ten people), which is a drop in the bucket (when compared to the kind of money I make when I’m working.)
Doing this type of thing – means more to me, than writing a check to
Not going to worry about that.
I just want to feel like I’m helping someone, you know? Someone who didn’t have the (successful) opportunities I had at their age.
I’m going to keep doing this, for now, and, hopefully continue doing this, when I’m back to work.
There are so many causes out there – we can’t solve them all, and I can’t even solve this particular one, but, I think this one, for some reason, is important to me, right now.
Thanks for listening.
Brian.
You’re a good man, Brian. I wouldn’t have been able to go back.